Biannual Man

It’s been 746 days since I last wrote here.

If I were an addict, it would be a point of pride to say, “I’m Scott Sealey and it’s been 746 days since my last drink/drug/sexual encounter.” But I’m not an addict. At least not for any of those things. I am slightly concerned about how much parmesan cheese I’ve been eating lately but that’s a topic for a different post.

“A different post.” How’s that for optimism? My first blog entry in two years and I’m already talking like I’m some sort of consistent blogger guru. Ha! My writing schedule comes from the George R. R. Martin School of “Yeah, Yeah. It’s Coming”. If I were an animal, I’d be one of those cicadas that shows up every 17 years, hangs out for a couple days, then dies. Let’s see… one more… one more… oh! Something something Halley’s Comet.

Two years away from my blog. That’s weirdly familiar. I don’t have a good reason for the absence except that I’ve spent that time completely blowing my life up by getting a divorce, buying and selling a stupid trailer that I didn’t really want, finding love with someone that makes me extremely happy, moving into a downstairs suite in someone else’s house, having that special person and her cats move in with me, doing a decent amount of travel (four provinces so far this year!), having surgery to reverse my vasectomy, and embarking on a general path of weirdness that had me wading through extreme lows at certain points but has eventually allowed me to find a sense of happiness and contentment that I’ve never experienced before.

Some might call that a “journey” but I hate that term. All that shit above? That’s just life. Add that to the fact that my day job requires me to sit and pound at a keyboard for eight hours a day and that by the time my day ends I don’t even want to think about writing anything and I guess it might make sense why I’ve been inconsistent in my posts.

My goal is to post more. No, really. I mean it. I actually do like doing this. Now that I’m happy and can prevent blogs from spiralling off into depressive ramblings, it’s going to be more fun. Plus I now have a computer that doesn’t shut off spontaneously causing me to lose my train of thought. That’ll be a big boost to my productivity.

As you can see from that long list of life events above, I’ve got a lot of material to write about. I was going to lead off with the vasectomy reversal as my first post back but I seem to gravitate towards writing about my bits and tackle quite often so I put them on the back burner for now. Instead, you got this post. Hopefully it was enticing enough to bring you back.

See you next week… or in two years. Whichever comes first.

Every Tenth Caller Gets Hung Up On

I wasn’t sure what to write about for this post so I decided to dive into my Evernote account to see if there were any gems that sparked up some inspiration. It, uh… yeah. It had some stuff in there. Although I write in it frequently, I use Evernote mainly as a repository for my ideas. Sort of like Uncle Scrooge’s vault in Ducktales but instead of being filled with gold and money, my “vault” is filled with bizarre one liners and crazy ideas.

In the Church of the Holy Words, We Take All the Hail Mary’s We Can Get

Today, I’m wearing my oldest cardigan. It’s wool, sort of an army or olive green, and isn’t particularly flattering. I caught a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror and my outfit has a distinct Mr. Rogers vibe to it. Well, I guess if Mr. Rogers was younger, had a mop of messy hair, and hadn’t fully slept off a Thanksgiving turkey hangover.

I don’t recall buying this cardigan. It seems like it’s always been a part of my wardrobe. It’s somewhat ill-fitting which is appropriate because I usually don it when I write and today, the act of putting words to keyboard is feeling a touch uncomfortable.

Two Years in Tibet… But Not Really

I’m sleepy, my fingernails feel like they are too long, and I don’t know what to write but holy eff, tit’s a new blog post on Late for the Ether Frolic! This is the first one I’ve made in two freakin’ years! In celebration of this momentous occasion, this video seemed appropriate:

Ugh, I hope that worked. I don’t even remember how to link properly anymore. But that’s OK, because using copyrighted intellectual property isn’t cool anyway.

There will be more entries coming soon. In fact, there might be a whole new Ether Frolic coming soon! But it might not be called Late for the Ether Frolic anymore. I haven’t decided. What I do know is that I’d like to try my hand at being a humourist and this might be a fun platform for it. I’ve always enjoyed doing these posts. And since Jenny and I bought a house (WTF, right?), I’m toying with the idea of creating a blog specifically to track our progress on it and to share my musings on home ownership. Here’s a preview: there are a lot of mice.

So that’s the plan. More words from me. More blogs from me. And maybe some photos too. I’ve been wanting to dust off the cameras lately. But that’s for later. Right now, I need some sleep.

So… uhhh… after a two year absence, I should probably leave off with something clever. Let’s see. Clever…clever… clever.

Ah screw it. I’ll come on here tomorrow. Oh, wait!

That’ll do Scott. That’ll do.

References Available Upon Request

I’m supposed to be writing a resume right now but, obviously, I’m not.  I’m writing this instead because I got frustrated with trying to puff up my accomplishments.

I feel like I’ve done so much in my life but it doesn’t translate well onto a resume.  I’m a pretty good writer.  I’m great with Microsoft Word and can build some fun documents.  I’m a good editor despite not knowing exactly how to explain why something isn’t right.  I’m decent with Photoshop and Lightroom.  I know a bunch about photography and cameras.  I’m very creative.  I’ve been pretty successful in sales and put up some great numbers.  I used to be an English teacher in another country.  I usually take on extra responsibilities wherever I work, often ending up  as a supervisor or assistant manager.  I’m a pretty good husband, albeit a messy one.  I have a pretty wide varitey of interests and am well read.  I’m funny (I think) and am usually well liked at my workplace (I hope).

12 (Candy) Bar Blues

I’m poised over the keyboard, planning to write the greatest blog entry ever and, of course, my mind goes blank.  Isn’t that always the case?  I haven’t written in months so you’d think there’d be no hesitation.  Like an over ripe plum, I should be oozing with juicy ideas, to the point where you’re afraid to pick me up for fear of getting some of me all over your hands.

Part of this stoppage in writing is that I’m frequently at work and it is among the least inspiring places ever.  Flourescent lights buzz quietly in the emptiness of a store potentially in its death throes.  Buzzing retail lights, are they the modern day equivalent of a “death rattle”?  Sergio Aragones must be spinning in his grave… or his chair should he still be alive.

Hold on a second. 

This One Time, At Idiot Camp…

While making supper the other night I listened in a bit on the show Jenny was watching. She likes to find new shows to watch whereas I will cycle through the same comedies over and over. Who knew that TV viewing habits could sum up personalities so well? Forget psychoanalysis, just check who’s recording what on the PVR to diagnose a marriage.

Go Tiny Time Machine! GO!

I spend far more time at work than I should.  I have a long post on the way about being at a job that’s not what you want to do but for now I just wanted to show how I kill off most work days.  Below is a picture of my new typing set up.  Minus the tablet of course.  I needed that to take the picture.

I love this kit.  It’s portable, light, and easy to type on.  I’m glad I  got this.  I’m writing a lot more now and being able to do it at work without having to bring my laptop is great.  There’s another benefit though.  Our store isn’t doing so well and sometimes there can be hours between customers.  This set up is helping me get through that.  If I can get into some kind of writing zone without being disturbed I can easily “disappear” for a few hours.

So here it is, my mobile work station:

Note the trusty Moleskine notebook right beside it.  As handy as this is, nothing will ever replace a good notebook and a solid pen.

More posts coming soon!

Milky Love

Once upon a time, there was this boy who lived in Saskatoon and he thought he had himself all figured out. He knew the foods he liked and didn’t want to try anything else. He preferred books to people and hid inside all the time, avoiding social gatherings and dodging any possibility of adventure. He lived with a friend and the apartment smelled like microwave popcorn, Febreeze and junk food farts. 

He thought he was happy but he wasn’t.

The Savage Beast Cannot Be Soothed or “I Prefer Chunky”

On this blog I’ve featured some rants in the past.  I’ve also covered a few things I hate.  Heck, I even had a post talking about how I shouldn’t use the word hate.  Whatever I wrote then still stands today.  Hate is a very strong word and I wish I didn’t use it so often.   I’ve tried to change my behavior and have succeeded somewhat but I’m still very much a crusty person who is quick to unleash the old H-bomb when something I disapprove of rolls past.